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I’m stuck in a massive style rut, but plan to get out of it right now!


I’m in a massive style rut. I basically hate all my clothes, and how they look on me. Also, I lost a lot of weight a while ago, then re-gained some, and now I seem to be somewhere in the middle. My old bottoms do not fit so well any longer, but really a size smaller I am neither.

Doesn’t matter, though. I have no idea what I want to wear or shop in general. Not only do I look boring in everything, but everything also looks just off on me.

So it’s true, motherhood changes how you dress – not only in terms of style, but the technicalities surrounding it as well. I had no idea this would be so until now, but when I happened to read this post it was basically about me: 

“Somehow, caught up in the whirlwind of early motherhood, I started thinking of getting dressed as a chore and that spending any time on my appearance was precious time wasted.”


So here’s my plan.

1 Moodboarding

I’ve actually been trying to put together a moodboard for the past year without success. That’s why for now, I decided to simply copy Maja Wyh. Yes, copy, because easier and hopefully more time-saving that way. And I think her style is perfect (for me). All monochrome, oversized and messy layers with a hint of asymmetry, a mix of feminine with masculine, and always looking effortless. I like that she stays true to her style and gives a f*xx about trends.


So future key buys inspired by the looks above: maxi skirts and dresses, heavy wide leg and/or flared trousers, pointed ankle boots, and a voluminous fur jacket.

Although I’ll say right now that I’ll copy everything, minus heels!

2 Decluttering

Since I was most of all frustrated with my wardrobe, first order of business was of course decluttering the whole thing. And immediately the fog lifted! My wardrobe is in order again, and suddenly new outfit ideas keep flooding in! Not only outfit ideas, though! Since decluttering, I’ve been super inspired and excited for all kinds of new things, so that’s good. And also funny how just reorganizing my wardrobe invigorates me!

3 Taking notes

However, I am always so full of random ideas already that I always forget about the best precisely when I need them. So me to me: write! it! down! Or draw, whichever helps.

(This bullet point actually concerns all other areas of my life. I absolutely need to write things down more, instead of trying to just remember everything.)

4 Shopping

Now of course comes the fun part: the shopping! I’m currently on an extensive (online) shopping spree, but so far have returned most of what I ordered. Which is OK, I’ll take my time about it.

There are a couple designer things I’m coveting at the moment, but I’m kind of done with designer clothes, to be honest. How come I always end up wearing the most expensive things in my wardrobe the least? I will try selling them soon, and then rather focus on quality high street items again in the future.

5 Inspiring

For inspiration, nowadays I love following cool women on Instagram who incidentally also happen to be moms, like @innika (who has three kids!), @nayoungkeem (a Korean TV personality) or @stacey_a_nishimoto. [More recommendations welcome!] They prove that it’s not about breaking your back and denying yourself for the sake of your kids – like my mom and her (Vietnamese) mom peers did, and which sadly used to be the only notion of motherhood I used to know – or that it’s even just about the kids. It’s about us, having fun and enjoying life together, even if that life is very different than before. Because, I mean, suddenly there’s a whole new person in it! And sure, there are terrible parts, but then there also are the inevitably glorious, absolutely splendid parts – and those are the ones to live for.


@leeyaeni // @innika // @nayoungkeem

What do you do when you’re stuck in a style rut? And any more fresh moms out there? Write me!


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